21-06-2006 wed

"Greatest glory in living is not in, never falling, but in rising every time after falling! "


i noe this phrase,i'm familiar with it,come across it whenever i pay a visit to nalanda house,a place where i could feel the calmess n peacefullness all around. however, i am being ignorant when i thought i knew this saying well,when i noe so little about it.only when i'm in a situation where i cant handle,and not mindful of being in that state,a kind reminder by bro tan about this phrase somehow make me wake up from this dream,dream of dellusion n fear.i realise how 'mindless' i'm when i'm supposed to be mindful,how weak i'm when the situation need me to be strong. yes,this is my 'pattern',this cycle of fear,depression,anxiety happen almost every month--during the exam peiod.instead of studying harder,i worry harder n trying to find a way to escape instead of coping with it.how long have i been doing tis?how long can i sustain with tis sort of disturbance?wake up,wake up,wake up from the dream,light up,light up,light up the path of wisdom.



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